Article

Relationship Connection: A Redux on the Role of Minding and the Quality of Feeling Special in the Enhancement of Closeness

John H. Harvey and Brian G. Pauwels

in The Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology

Second edition

Published in print July 2009 | ISBN: 9780195187243
Published online September 2012 | | DOI: http://dx.doi.org/10.1093/oxfordhb/9780195187243.013.0036
 Relationship Connection: A Redux on the Role of Minding and the Quality of Feeling Special in the Enhancement of Closeness

More Like This

Show all results sharing these subjects:

  • Psychology
  • Social Psychology
  • Clinical Psychology

GO

Show Summary Details

Preview

Achieving constructive relationship connections is an important step as an objective of positive psychology. In the context of a culture of dissolution in close relationships, minding serves as an antidote to the demise of feelings of closeness overtime. In this paper, we argue that minding the close relationship is a powerful pathway to developing and enhancing closeness. Minding is a combination of thought and behavior patterns that interact to create stability and feelings of closeness. Minding is formally defined as a reciprocal knowing process that occurs nonstop throughout the history of the relationship and that involves a complex package of interrelated thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. The components of minding are knowing and being known, achieved through reciprocal self-disclosure; attribution that is realistic about causality, but that also gives one's partner the benefit of doubt in questionable circumstances; acceptance of what one discovers in the knowing process and respect for one's partner revealed in this process; and reciprocity and continuity. The final component emphasizes the fact that minding must be done by both partners and that it is a never-ending process. The paper also describes other contemporary conceptions to which minding is closely related and addresses future direction for research on the minding process.

Keywords: acceptance and respect; knowing and being known; minding; reciprocity

Article.  5655 words. 

Subjects: Psychology ; Social Psychology ; Clinical Psychology

Full text: subscription required

How to subscribe Recommend to my Librarian

Buy this work at Oxford University Press »

Users without a subscription are not able to see the full content. Please, subscribe or login to access all content.